Being Vulnerable

It seems that I misunderstood what being vulnerable means.

I think it’s safe to say I’m not going to make much sense in this post. Bear with me.

I’ve thought that I’m an open kind of person. I can see another person’s view, respect it, maybe agree with it.

But looking back, I think I’m prone to protecting myself more often than not.

I would rather avoid the arena or was too lazy to enter.

Being there now is not where I wanted to be.

These days, I’m a little better. I go to work. I swim mostly on time at 6am. I meditate in the morning. I try to draw and write every day.

Whoo boy. I’m really, really afraid of shooting my foot right now.

Every time I write some accomplishments, I have that feeling of arrival, not that sense that I have a journey to take.

And when I arrive, I stop.

Please God, help me think I’m still on the journey.

Well, the words are plunked down. And I’m going to keep them as they get published.

The daily posts are a walk into the arena.

The sketches and inks produced are walking into arenas.

My work to create projects is walking into the arena.

I’ve been stepping into different arenas facing different opponents carrying different weapons.

Feeling vulnerable is never easy. But each time I do so, I know I’m getting stronger and better.

And I need to get stronger for what I’m going to do in the days to come.

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